Hatchet Jobs and Character Assassinations

This is an impromptu post – one that I couldn’t really add to the thread.

On the top level, this blog is about GAME.  But you guys know that I think game is merely applied psychology.  Things I do in the romantic arena, I often grab from everyplace else.

After a while you start to see patterns.

This is Scott Adams – he’s a conservative guy that draws Dilbert.  He predicted the current presidential election.

This isn’t a profile, or somebody in the press who clearly got it wrong trying to figure out how Adams was able to see the writing on the wall – it’s a hatchet job, a character assassination.  Something that women often do to other women with little remarks here and there.  I had an ex that knew exactly what obviously true thing to comment on, such that the recipient was made to feel low.

Let me be clear – I think Adams may be right on the psychological opinions, but my politics are not his nor 45’s.  I’m not sure how folks can come to a site named after West Indian Archie and think otherwise.

Let’s start with the title

How Scott Adams Got Hypnotized by Trump

The key word here is *hypnotized* .  If you’ve read Adams’s take on Trump, Adams’s basically says that Trump was using a lot of actual psychological techniques – and that was a large part of how he was able to win the Republican Nomination.  Trump, according to Adams, was using hypnosis at a grand level.

The author here basically subverts Adams’ argument and says that HE, Adams, got hypnotized.

Why?  Because most people 1) don’t believe hypnosis is real, and more importantly, 2) only dumb people get hypnotized.

Scott Adams, the millionaire creator of the office-humor comic strip

Millionaire – again, the author is using true traits to describe Adam’s, but these traits have CONNOTATIONS.  Without spelling it out, she hits on the idea that “Of course a millionaire is going to support another millionaire.”

a fellow “Master Wizard,” Adams’s term for experts in hypnosis and persuasion.

Master Wizard is in quotes because that’s what the style of newspaper journalism dictates – but again – using the quotes draws your eye and make syo generate ideas consciously and subconsciously.   This mf’er think’s he’s a wizard.

With about 10,000 readers on a good day, Adams’s blog had a fraction of the audience of his cartoon…

Oh, he only gets traffic on a good day.  I would kill for 10,000 readers.  That’s a ton of people.

But in the digital sphere, Adams was able to indulge his more outré interests and theories.

The key words here are “indulge” and “outré” .  Indulge has connotations of the negative, and “outré” – you don’t need to know French to understand that these are “not mainstream”.

At a time when virtually the entire professional political class was convinced Trump would self-immolate, Adams’s essay reframed his actions as the deliberate work of a political savant.

Here it is again, Adams is on the outer fringe and wrong about 45.  This isn’t neutral.

making himself indispensable as one of Trump’s most appreciative interpreters

He was using Trump for his own ends.

he wasn’t endorsing Trump, just doing his part to help the public better read a misunderstood candidate

He’s “redeemable” in the voice of the mainstream.

Getting a comic strip, even one as occasionally edgy as Dilbert, into family newspapers requires observing a certain set of norms. Adams’s viral analyses of Trump introduced many people, including me, to his more unusual fixations. Between political ponderings, he blogged about fitness and seduction, posting photos of his abs and writing a series of essays on how to deploy hypnosis and persuasion for better orgasms. “My language skills activate your sex drive, and you know it,” he wrote at one point. So-called men’s rights activists became vocal fans. I was just baffled

Norms vs Unusual Fixations – sets up the Us vs Him dynamic

Offering up game as something to be ridiculed. (I understand it)

MRA’s are media codewords, a “dog-whistle” if you will.

“I was just baffled”  – It’s not so much that the author was baffled by what Adams is saying, but that his world view does not comport with the rest of the world.

So what happens when the Author meets this strange guy?

He turned out to be soft-spoken and friendly.

Author expected him to be loud and antagonistic. (the exact sort of person that could invite a reporter to his house).  Author emphasizes this to the audience, because Author wants them to approach Scott the way the Author does.

At almost 60, Adams conveyed the energy of a teenage boy. Short and wiry, with thinning, close-cropped hair,

The NY Times is famous for doing this.  Including these personal details, these physical descriptions, so that you can discount what someone is saying.  The teenage boy crack again builds the underlying background of a “man boy” with “man boy” opinions.  The “thinning” hair helps to de-virilize the man.

This ones a bit more subtle -but speaks to a certain segment of the audience

After offering me coffee, he opened a can of coconut water and sat on a tall stool at the island in his kitchen.

The way that some will read this is that he was polite.  The way that the Author wants you to read this is that he could have also offered Coconut Water, but instead he keeps the “good stuff” to himself.  Further “sat on a tall stool” – implying that he was looking down on the Author.  Where did the author sit?  Why is his the only position mentioned?

Adams’s house is a shrine to the cartoon character that made him rich.

Let’s make this 60 year old man, artist, into a rich man child.

structure is full of indulgent quirks

Indulgent and quirks – This guys is rich and immature.

he transformed a bar area (Adams doesn’t drink…

Because immature boys don’t drink.\

where his ex-wife (now Adams’s personal assistant) used to host spa days for friends

What an interesting little detail right?  What kind of picture are we drawing of Adams?

Can we take a swipe at The Game real quick?

a signed copy of The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists, a book of strategies for seducing women. (Adams said he hadn’t read it.)

But the Author makes it a point to say that he owns a copy.  A signed copy at that

Why exactly are we interested in this aspect of a man that predicted 45’s election?  The author makes it clear.

When I visited, Adams’s girlfriend of three months, Kristina Basham, was living with him, along with her two daughters. She’s 28. Until recently, she maintained a website that showed her posing in a bikini, described as a model and baker, with a D cup size.

So in sequence, we had reference to the Ex Wife, now his implied suffering personal assistant.  He has a copy of the Game.  His girlfriend has merely been with him for 3 months.

Props to Scott though, this chick is really attractive.  She may be trying to play him, but there are younger millionaires out there. Even some who have no problem with her single motherhood.


But she has 2 daughters!  And she’s only 28 (a. he’s robbing the cradle, b. she has two daughters to feed).

“Until Recently” – so something just ended.

“In a bikini…D Cup size” – she’s a bimbo, gold digger.

So the author then describes some good internet marketing and a new way to get on in this economy. (it’s the same thing Cal Newport and others are promoting)

“The idea of a talent stack is that you can combine ordinary skills until you have enough of the right kind to be extraordinary,” he wrote. “You don’t have to be the best in the world at any one thing. All you need to succeed is to be good at a number of skills that fit well together.”

This is great advice.   So how does the author undercut it?

Basham, he noted, was smart, knew model tricks about posing and makeup, and used social media hacks such as SEO and A/B testing. (“For example, although her Instagram photos are G-rated, any hint of side-boob adds at least 10% to her engagement.”)

Adams takes this gold digger, that he’s too old for, that he’s too dumb to see through – and then the Author focuses on the most prurient detail.

Here’s a salient point that somehow the Author decided to include, despite the general hatchet job here – or maybe the Author includes it to make Adams look delusional

“I’m not much of an artist, not much of a business expert, and my writing skills are mostly self-taught,” Adams wrote. “I’m funny, but not the funniest person in my town. The reason I can succeed without any world-class skills is that my talent stack is so well-designed.” Trump’s stack, he continued, was powerful. “He isn’t the best communicator in the world, but he is very good. He doesn’t know as much about politics as career politicians do, but apparently he knows enough. He isn’t the smartest person who ever ran for office, but he’s very smart. He might not be the best business strategist in the world, but he certainly knows his stuff

What about this Gold Digger underlying message

Basham had recently persuaded Adams to take a trip to London and Zurich—the first time he’d ever traveled beyond Canada and Mexico. “I don’t like being uncomfortable,” he said, “and travel is uncomfortable.”

The gold digger gets him to take trips to places that we know are expensive.  And because he’s a man boy, he rarely travels.

Then the author decides to showcase one of his side businesses

To demonstrate the product, he showed me a timeline he’d made featuring Victoria’s Secret models.

Is Adams a perv?

“I don’t know how you get a stomach like that, except through lots of situps and not eating,” he said, admiring one of the women.

The picture is being painted.

Why is he like this?

As a child, Adams lived in the town of Windham, N.Y., with two siblings. “I’d say we grew up in a family where no one ever hugged,

Oh, let’s get Freudian!  So where did this fascination with hypnosis start? Picking up the thread from the beginning of the article – before we established that his rich man-boy, with a suffering ex wife, and a young gold digger single wife he only knows how to use her looks for money.

His mom also got him interested in hypnosis. “She gave birth to my younger sister while under hypnosis,” Adams told me.

Can we some how downplay is accomplishments and also make him look pervy?

After graduating as valedictorian of his 40-person high school class, Adams enrolled at Hartwick College in central New York, which he said he chose largely because it had a nursing school and thus more women than men

Mission accomplished!

Wait is there something else we can do to make this guy look horrible?

At both the bank and the phone company, Adams has said, his professional advancement was thwarted by diversity hires. “There was no hope for another generic white male to get promoted any time soon

Later in the book, he noted that his Dilbert TV show was canceled after “the network made a strategic decision to focus on shows with African-American actors

He’s a racist!  Though that’s not what we talked about when I spoke to him, it’s what he said in his book.  I mean, there are his words – I just didn’t confront him about them when I was face to face with him. So let’s finish up the character assassination.

Starting in the late ’90s, Adams also launched a line of vitamin-infused vegan microwave burritos called Dilberitos, which were discontinued after a few years, and two restaurants, which went belly-up

He also wrote two religion-themed novellas, published in 2001 and 2004, which, he told me, will be his ultimate legacy—not Dilbert.

Hmm, he was behind a cockamamie product that would probably get funding today?  And he’s a religious nut?

Hmm, what else can I check off the list.  Immature, Racists, Rich, Dumb, Religious?

he second novella, a follow-up titled The Religion War, describes a civilizational conflict in 2040 between a violent caliphate in the Middle East and a Christian alliance in the West. The hard-nosed hero builds a wall around the jihadists and “essentially kills everybody there,” Adams told me. “I have to be careful, because I’m talking about something pretty close to genocide, so I’m not saying I prefer it, I’m saying I predict it.”

Adams isn’t doing himself any favors here.  He might be the Alex Jones of the cartoon game. But the Author is able to uncover but also report what Adams’s says himself.

Can we rehabilitate him so it doesn’t look like a full on hatchet piece?

until in 2005 he suddenly lost the ability to talk with other people. The mysterious condition is known as voice dystonia.

Damn that’s kinda messed up.  But…

“Losing the ability to speak made me feel like a ghost. It was incredibly lonely.” The inexplicable condition, which doctors attributed to a possible mental condition, persisted for three years.

Oh, you want me to think he’s crazy.

If crazy is not good enough, maybe it’s something else

Pastis says, is that Adams simply craves attention. “Cartoonists are addicted to reaction. I don’t know whether Scott would admit that, but I know it’s true.”

Okay maybe he’s crazy like a fox? Here the Author makes it a point to draw parallels between the cartoon and 45.

Trump has eerie parallels to Dogbert, who consistently gets ahead at everyone else’s expense. In the ’90s, Dogbert published a fake-news-filled tabloid dedicated to denouncing enemies and promoting lies about himself

I’d thought the point of those strips was to laugh at Dogbert’s cruelty—not celebrate it.

And the Author wraps everything else up.

So the reader comes into the article thinking that either we’re going to get into Adams’ idea that 45 is a master persuader/hypnotist – and that Adams fell under his spell.   But leaves with the idea that Adams is the clueless and also awful guy.  And mostly because Adams is hanging himself with “his own” words and actions.

This is a not-so-subtle character assassination that basically ticks off every box for things that regular dislike

  1. Rich
  2. Immature
  3. Sexist
  4. Racist
  5. Super Religious
  6. Anti-Muslim
  7. Bad Business Guy
  8. Possibly Crazy
  9. Possibly Seditious

The Author is running A LOT OF GAME on US about a guy who runs game (Adam) who talked about another guy running game (45).

Now, in my view, Adams is probably all of these things that the Author describes.  Half the people I deal with online probably ticked off one of these boxes.  And that’s not GOOD.  You shouldn’t be some of these things, full stop.  But from a realistic perspective

  1. Not all of that is objectively objectionable (Rich, immature, wanting to date attractive women, trying to do business, having mental illness, imagining alternative histories)
  2. That cannot be the entirety of his life and his views



Short Term vs Long Term

“Being a grandfather is quite different. It’s much looser than being a parent. I don’t have to always worry about providing patterns of behavior. I just get to give her little kisses. I was allowed to borrow her this morning so we are walking through the park. It’s our personal pastime. She likes to look at the dogs and birds. Today we saw some blackbirds which was quite exciting.” (Santiago, Chile)

Not implying Grandpa is going to die anytime soon – but one of the key differences in a short term is that you don’t need to do the work that is necessary to get the chick to behave right. (And she doesn’t need to do the necessary stuff either)


The Limits of Cold Approach (10 Game Continued)

The homie KD on the thread finds himself in familiar player territory.

  • His diet game is good.
  • His work out game is good.
  • His clothing game is good.
  • He can spot a chick that’s already down from a mile away.
  • His rap has been honed
  • He has good logistics

He regularly pulls chicks that he rates as cute to good looking.  But the super hot chicks, he does not regularly land those.

I think he has his the limit of cold approach.

Yeah, I said it.

I didn’t say that he hit the limit of GAME, but the limit of cold approach.

Let’s do a quick recap of cold approach.

  • You look as good as you can. (diet, exercise, grooming, clothes)
  • You regularly talk to chicks.
  • You have your funnel on point.
  • You can be funny, provocative, endearing, and all that good stuff.

So you see a chick, walk over to her, get her attention, and start interacting with her.  You have good words sometimes, sometimes your appeal is in your confidence

Sometimes it is your non-verbal…your sub-communication that does the work.

  • You close the space between you and her
  • You get into her space
  • You break the touch barrier
  • You back off before she backs off.

This is the essence of game.  And the more girls you deal with, the more you can communicate verbally and non-verbally.

Most guys aren’t going out.  Most guys that go out, don’t approach.  Of the guys that approach, most don’t have a plan.  But  you have go out, you approach, you have a plan.  Within a few months (of going out 3+ times a week), you’ll have enough experience with women that most of this stuff becomes internalized.

Then you hit the wall.

Now we’ve talked about very very attractive girls being intimidating – but most of that intimidation is in your mind.  You get over that and essentially get into your groove – these chicks fold.  They’re not used to a guy that’s really centered.

All of this basic mastery of cold approaches for one night stands with girls you meet in the night life is well established.  Everyone selling a pick up product is basically teaching you how to deal with tis.

But what about the Video Vixens?  What about the Super Models?  What about the connected club chicks in VIP?  What about the girls that you see Rock Stars and Athletes with?

There is a certain level of female that you just don’t see on the regular.  I mean see a cute face, nice set of D Cups, and some 5″ heels on any given night.   When you do see the “NFL Cheerleader” type chick – even if you can be entirely centered and run your game – there is a distance between the two of you.  She’ll gladly listen to you, encourage you or whatever – but she just doesn’t see you that way. You’re not on her radar.

On the street, this rarely happens.  A chick can think whatever she wants – but during the day time – her social reality is quite fragile.

At night though?

Even when you look the part, when you’ve got a table – her social world is one involving people of some “status”.   I don’t mean doctors or lawyers or politicians.  Not even CEO’s.   But the status that hot girls that you meet at clubs that stay in VIP –  focus on.

This girl?  She can pull a rich guy.  She can pull a pretty boy.  She can pull a tall dude. She can pull a guy with muscles.  She can pull a guy that has all of those qualities.   All the stuff you can think of, and put on paper – she can get.  She’s that beautiful. (She’s a Victoria’s Secret Model – we’re talking about beauty decided by the crowd – not decided by you.  You probably would take a Keisha Grey or an Abella Danger first)

But if that guy doesn’t have status in her world – it’s pointless.  He’s a peon, not peer, much less a superior.   It’s not that she can’t like a regular guy  per se – but a regular Jamal off the street, or at the club – he’s nobody.  He’s just some random dude.

She is just a regular girl with a massive (though mental) social barrier.

What does a girl like this crave?

She wants a higher social status.

Even though  she does crave the game – your insight into her world, into her mind, her soul – the social status is more important. Now if you can bring her up a level, and then get next to this chick, and get her to give you a chance to turn her head around – it’s game over.


Getting physically next to this chick is difficult, but that’s not enough.  Maybe you can do some push aways and disqualify yourself – so that she wonders what’s wrong with her, and why you don’t want her – but you’re still not REAL TO HER.  She doesn’t value your opinion or your insight.

But what if you were in her scene?  If you were a photographer, a fashion designer, the dj at the fashion show, the bartender at the event?

Imagine coming at that girl like you were a peer?  Like when she went out to club, you were already in VIP hanging with the big dogs?

Why does everyone know you?  Why are you special?

How come the DJ shouts your name?

So with some of these 10’s, that are socially isolated from the rest of humanity – you’re not even on the board with her until you’re a somebody.

How do you do that?

On the surface, it’s knowing a ton of people, a ton of the right people.  But in reality, it’s a ton of the right people KNOWING YOU.

What this chick is after is more than just the tangible shit.   She can get that, in spades.

She wants STATUS.  And if you have status among people that she respects, that she wants in her life – that’s when your one-on-one game can work.

Indeed, if she sees you interacting with the big wigs – you’re not cold approaching anymore.  You’re not some random stranger, you’re someone she wants to meet but doesn’t know yet.

In terms for the night game, Mystery, Brad P, them RSD boys – they’ve been talking about this on the back burner for years.   Group Theory, Merge Set, plus the new internet stuff is how you go from being cool guy in the general population of the club, to a guy that’s behind the scenes and making things happen.

Now this usually happens organically.  I definitely make it a part of my game to meet all the people that run the club – be it actual club staff, dj’s, or promoters.

General Night Club Game is real and effective.   And when you see the same faces, you hit the after hour foods spot, the after parties, maybe a summer time cook out.

To get to that 10 level – you need to start bringing value to those folks you’ve met in the night life.  For the cool guys, you throw them some girls that you’ve met.  For the girls, you throw them cool girls.  You’re trying to build a circle.  But you’re not doing it blindly.  You want to build that circle that the type of chick that you’re after wants to be in.

Why do all of this work?

Because you have to break down the social barriers and make your cold approaches WARM.

In practice this looks like you going to the same set of clubs, befriending the top dogs, and then throwing all the decent looking cute chicks at them.  Literally picking a girl and her friend up on Friday, and then going out with them Saturday – and introducing them to the guys in the good groups.

The idea is that you need to become a connector of people.  That’s how you break down the 10’s social barrier – by elevating your own social status – to be in her circle, or above it.

This is a bit esoteric, and I promise to explain more in the book – but this gives you an idea of why you can’t really connect with some of these hotties at the club.

Though you may be good looking and have good game – they aren’t hooking up with randoms.  They’re going for guys that have “status” in their eyes.  Deconstructing the status, and getting in there, is how you get them to “see you”



Why you should reject the numbers game and statistical approaches

For four straight election cycles, Democrats have ignored research from the fields of cognitive linguistics and psychology that the most effective way to communicate with other humans is by telling emotional stories.

Tell the politicians and the hustlers to live and let live.  At about 4:01 for you heads.

My thing on this blog is to not tell you better routines – but to develop your mind for the game.  The foundation of all game is understanding human psychology.  Meeting girls is just one avenue of that psychology. So a good source of “non-game” game comes from anything where people are involved.

Archie, “How many chicks do I need to talk to until…I get laid…until I get a girlfriend.”

What the election taught *some* Democrats (the smart ones) that you can not depend on stats and data crunching to win elections.

So the brute force approach to game – although useful for LEARNING – but not for actual pulling.

Telling emotional stories is a big key to the game.  During the approach, during the attraction generation, during the trust build, AFTER YOU READ THE BIBLE (Because that’s what we’re all trying to do, meet a nice Christian girl, right?!?)

“The human mind is a story processor, not a logic processor,” as social psychologist Jonathan Haidt has written).

Convincing a voter—challenging an existing frame—is no small task. “When you hear a word, its frame (or collection of frames) is activated in your brain,” writes Lakoff. As a result, “if a strongly held frame doesn’t fit the facts, the facts will be ignored and the frame will be kept.”

What? Frame?  Scientists use “game” terms?

No, we use scientific terms.

So let this be a seed for your next game idea.  When you’re chatting up a lady, ask yourself what emotional story am I telling her?

  • What am I saying with my words?
  • With my body language?
  • With my actions?

Because just chatting chicks up in series is not enough.


Low Level Game – Fishing for Eye Contact

Compiling stuff for the Book 1 – and I came across this post.  Reading it, I basically left it unfinished.

So the thing about music, film, tv shows, novels – they are fiction.  But successful fiction captures real life.

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Here’s my take on the gif’s

  1. Player sees a good looking chick
  2. He makes/forces eye contact (This is the low level game part)
  3. She likes what she sees? (wants to play along, feel her own sexuality), and flirts back (?)
  4. He takes the “crossing of her legs” as a “go” signal
  5. When she leaves, he steps up behind her and goes for the inadvertent touch
  6. She seems to like it, be surprised, and is kinda feeling him

Now watch the full scene

The full scene shows a non-verbal flirtation turn into a fight or flight response.

So my point here with the “low level” game descriptor – was that even though this was all non-verbal, making signals, figuring out signals – a lot of “naturals” scan the crowd or interact with women in this way.  They look for eye contact, they fish for it, they try to make it happen – but as you can tell by Fassbender’s URGENCY – he actually scares away the cat.

So the low level part is that you can get these “false starts” – because you’re dealing with a sexual creature that will show herself to you – but not really be ready to go all the way.

It’s low level because the player doesn’t understand the chick’s social constraints.  It’s cold, they’re headed to work/home, the train is crowded – it’s not even playing poker here, it’s playing the Powerball and hoping that dude’s non-verbal signals in this chaos can actually spark something.

If this were summer?  it might be different.

If the train wasn’t as packed, he could use a few words to break the tension.

If they weren’t going to work, he could push past her and then TURN BACK and try to get something started.

But it’s clear to me at least, even though my boy has the hunger – he doesn’t have a PLAN.  He can’t turn her little flash of mischief (peep the wedding ring) into a quick tryst.

It’s not that she wasn’t sexually attracted.

Peep this next scene (or watch the movie)



Anger Part Deux

Anger is also a fuel for dominance.

The problem with pronouncements like this is there is no context

I’d say a good portion of people that get into game “want to get back at these bitches”. They want to fuck chicks and they think that by charming the pants off these broads, they’re somehow righting the scales of karmic justice.


To an extent, that righteous anger WORKS.

I hate to say it, but sometimes what motivates men to “greatness” or at least competence is this need to get back at the world.  Of course, nobody wants to admit how “base” our motivations really can be.

Where I basically draw the line is seeing women as “the enemy”.  I don’t tend to like War or Business or Sports analogies in game – because it quickly becomes “crush the competition”.  To, me that feeds the wrong sort of mentality and closes down more possibilities than it opens up.

But that anger, that rage, it’s usually in the background. It’s rarely in the foreground.

So going back to yesterday’s 10 point break down, let’s just split it back to 2 cases.


Case #1 The Pull

If unfettered anger is expressed during the pull…

An emotionally healthy girl would rightfully reject a guy for being unsound of mind.  Like, why are you even mad dude?

There’s a wringle. Guys who know the game can focus in on the term of art of above.

*Emotionally healthy*

What we know from the game is that even though a “good” girl would exit the scene when a guy gets angry – there are plenty of chicks who get excited and others who go submissive/compliant only in that situation. [Ed. ‘good’ is in quotes]

The legitimate bad boy and the “heart on his sleeve” artist unconsciously trade in this type of behavior.

When these guys start getting mad, showing forbidden emotions – A chick that likes this sort of thing – either goes into nurse/motherly mode or she becomes Harley Quinn. She wants to take away the pain, or ride the train into crazy town.

A lot of these broads, hot ones especially, crave this sort of thing.  Every girl has the story of this boyfriend that put her through the emotional wringer.  When she retells the story (where she’s almost always the victim, never has any agency of her own) – it might be 85% “I hate that guy”…and 15% of  censored for sensitive eyes.

Lots of chicks love the drama until they find themselves at a woman’s shelter.  He said he was a gangsta, and now you’re surprised when those fists come your way?

A lot of that anger I spoke on above, the background hatred, comes from guys who knew chicks that went with these badboys that made them cry.  And she’s sitting on the curb, and you gotta come scoop her ass up.  A couple days later, she’s getting banged by him again…and days after that beaten again.

Meanwhile, poor nice guy made his play, and he wasn’t exciting enough.

Let’s not go there.   Enough has been said on the fact that Mr. Nice Guy is actually very manipulative – and being nice to a girl for the purpose of sleeping with her is actually something a creep does.

Let’s talk about her.  Why do some of the girls like this sort of horrible treatment? I don’t want to use the “C” word (Clinical)…but…
Borderline personality disorder is very gendered

Borderline personality disorder is more prevalent in females (75 percent of diagnoses made are in females). It is thought that this disorder affects between 1.6 and 5.9 percent of the general population.

Like most personality disorders, BPD typically will decrease in intensity with age, with many people experiencing few of the most extreme symptoms by the time they are in the 40s or 50s.

More from this source

A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation

Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)


Now the thinking man who becomes a player, not a born player but self made, conscious, deliberate – he may dabble in this stuff as part of his pursuit of the dark triad. In my mind, the guy who does this is the Lester Diamond of Casino.

Case #2 – the LTR and the failure of Game to show you how to use Anger

By LTR, I mean a committed one. The type of thing you find yourself in if you’re not careful. The Home Depot and Bed, Bath, and Beyond stage.  Making dinner together, pet names, looking at getting a place, her leaving stuff at yours.

So you’re with a chick, and she does something to displease you. Because you played Mr. Cool during you’re entire bachelorhood, and you never chastised a chick.

If a chick does something you don’t like, you just stopped calling her, you replaced her.  You never tried to tell the bitch her shit stank. Believe me when I tell you that I’ve been guilty of this.

Now what do you do?
Reason with her?
Get mad out of nowhere?

Had you been showing your full range of emotion when you was with the chick before she locked you in a cage, you’d have that avenue.

But since you were player for life, you never had to deal with one chick’s bullshit.

You ever wonder why a lot of these gurus talk about dread and competition anxiety? It’s because they’re looking for external ways to control a broads behavior without having to get their hands dirty. Without dealing with their own emotions.

It’s a direct line from this James Bond idea of never showing emotion, never having any.

It’s not surprising to us that a lot of these guys that are all technique fail to have good long term monogamous relationships when they actually try to. They stay solo and just have stolen drift in and out of their lives. They have retreated into their fortresses of solitude.

So part 3 in a couple of days.


Furious Anger

What’s the proper way to leverage anger and aggression in game?

Basically chicks expect you to be certain ways/have certain behaviors along the time line

1. when you show up
2. when you walk up
3. your first words
4. your reaction to her reaction
5. your reaction to her testing you
6. your reaction to her submission
7. your reaction to last minute/token resistance
8. what happens during sex
9. what happens after sex

10. during the relationship

Option A – 80% of guys
The guy who doesn’t know a thing about game, and gets all his lessons from Mom and Dad, Religion, his know nothing friends, music, and Hollywood
– wants to be totally cool (nothing phases me man)
– in actuality, the second he doesn’t get what he wants – he gets mad, shuts down, gets angry, starts becoming unstable

^This dude is very predictable.

Option B – 15% of guys
The guy who is game aware – who at least realizes that his behavior and her psychology are a factor in attracting her
– wants to be totally cool
– controls his reaction, so that he’s basically a cold hearted

^She keeps trying to get a rise out of him – to check his alpha, to check her womanhood, because she’s bored….

There are times when you can’t be ice cold with a chick, not if you want to keep her.

Option C – the 4% – the 1 in 25 – the guy who understands that his behavior/emotions is the real factor in getting a chick on the hook, and keeping her on the hook

This includes your dark triad approach of intermittent/random shows of emotion – guys who do it intentionally to make the girl think that He’s in to her “like that”
And also guys who see that a chick wants a fight, and then goes for the god damn jugular, giving her the roller coaster, and then blaming her for it – if it turns against him.

Option D – the 1%

These are your poets, singers, musicians, artists – who live emotional lives – that chicks get swept up in.
There’s nothing calculated about these guys, his whole life is a roller coaster – and she gets swept up in it, trying to save him.

He’s more emotional than her bipolar ass.

So going back to the time line.

1. when you show up (to the venue, in her life, in her vantage point) – showing good emotions to other people is generally good – IF they react positively to your emotions.  You gotta win a frame battle with a 3rd party to make this broad impressed.  The only time anger works here is if somebody punks you, and you gotta come back at them.  And to be honest, I’ve never seen the Hollywood scenario where dude gets into something with another dude, and a chick is impressed with his alpha.
And trust me, I’ve seen plenty of club fights.

2. When you walk up –  You can’t be angry, but smiling can work against you

3. your first words – this is where she expects you to be shiny and happy, and not being exactly what she expects can help.
To illustrate, you can be happy one second, walk up to the broad, and then
put your face on that says “This bitch here”
Then you say, “Man, what am I gonna do with you”

It’s not anger, but it’s an invitation to play a bit, because she doesn’t know exactly when the punchline is gonna come.

4. your reaction to her reaction – if she’s not feeling you that second, and you react angrily – you lose here.

You literally have to be unreactive, as if she said nothing.

5. your reaction to her testing you

Some of the time, a chick is consciously fucking with you.
Most of the time, her words and behavior are entirely intentional, but she’s not intending to fuck with you.
It’s just from a male perspective, it seems like she IS trying to fuck with you.

When a chick is trying to fuck with you – that’s a frame battle.

When a chick wants to sit down – and you interpret that as a diss – but in reality it’s because her feet hurt –

You getting angry, butt hurt, pouting about whatever – changes the second-to-second dynamic.

6. your reaction to her submission

After you go back and forth, and she lets up on her banter.
You still need some compliance/submission.

You have to recognize it it when she gives it to you.

Anger isn’t called for here.
And sometimes a slight push (a neg perhaps), after she’s bought in – hurts you.

7. your reaction to last minute/token resistance

Non-reactive, everything is cool, no means not just yet….

Anger here will get you caught up.  Lose the bang, and might end up in jail.

8. what happens during sex

I’m not saying you need to cause vaginal trauma or anything like that – but a lot of chicks act like bitches so that you can fuck them HARD.

9. what happens after sex

You’ll lose subsequent bangs by showing anger here

10. The Relationship

This is where you need to be able to assert yourself.
And adding anger or some other emotional layer to your actions and subcommunications is helpful.



Question from the Cheap Seats

You’ve got a girl hooked Where do you take it from there? How do you isolate?

The girls I’ve pulled at the club have been extremely nonverbal interactions. A Hi, grab her hand, and go. But how do you do it when she wants to talk?

1st things first, I hate terms like “isolation”.  Think about it as getting some privacy.

Let’s start with the preamble.

All the game I give you guys is maybe 70% textbook and 30% WIA.

I like to talk to chicks, I like reading. I like art, literature, music and good food. So much so that ideas from those realms infiltrate everything that I do.

When I’m at work typing up TPS reports, there’s a bit of hip hop in it, there’s some ox tail and rice and peas when I do my laundry.

The basic outline of every pick up is
– See the girl
– Get her attention
– Start the conversation
– Dazzle her (this could be non-verbal as well. Like you’re dancing in one area, you make eye contact, dance over, get her to fall in your rhythm and change up…and keep changing up to see if she can follow. Then you can do start some of the dance floor role play..)

– She’s into it what you’re saying at first, and then
– She’s in to you, and starts to seek your approval/starts to seek rapport.

I run indirect primarily.  And just going by the model

I make her double down on seeking my approval, and then I give it grudgingly. This is not nefarious, but an acknowledging that a chick really doesn’t dig you, unless you make her work for it.  If the game is too easy, you get bored.

Think of it this way. From the very beginning you want her to be winning you over. You have to really believe that it’s not enough for her to have a nice face, a nice body, and good style.  With experience, you realize that those things just get your curiosity, but not your full attention.

Think to yourself,

“I’m Apple. I made a big product announcement. And now I’m selling the iPhone 7, she’s standing in line and trying to cut.”

So in a set, she might be bragging on herself to which you respond

“yeah, yeah, yeah, you talk a good game, but …I don’t believe you can tie a cherry stem into a knot.
Prove it…and I’m not buying the drink, I know how crafty you girls are. In fact, get me a rum and coke WITH a cherry!”

*make her invest*

That’s the psychological basis for the front end of the game (attraction, trust, connection)

This can happen on a loud dance floor with dancing, or at a loud bar.  It can happen in the line at Chipotle. Wherever you start an interaction, this can happen.

Now that she’s begging to hear more from you, what next?

Get her logistics before you make a move.

What is her situation?

“Oh you came with a big mixed group.”

I think – Ahh, so there might be a male or a female friend in that group. So she can’t just leave with me.

And even if she could just leave with me, I want to build up trust with her offensively, but also screen her – cause I’m not 25 anymore and I can’t fuck Double D’s regardless of the consequences.  She might seem prim and proper, but you chat up the friends that she’s with, and you realize that she might just memorize where you live and come roll you later.

Gauge how independent she is.

You want to know from her what sort of problems you might run into with her friends.  And remember, that beautiful women are rarely alone.

“You don’t strike me as the adventurous type….oh you are…

No I think you’re the type that has to check in with your friends…like you go to the little girl’s room with your bestie…

What do you do in there anyway…You know at my job the lady’s room has carpet..first time I was in there…..

Why was I there you ask? OMG, we’re not even that close yet….enough about me…”


“Is she gonna give *us* any grief about getting to know each other”

If she’s not very independent – YOU HAVE TO MEET AND DEFUSE THE FRIENDS.

You have to play this part by ear, but I like to build up more trust, rapport, and comfort after the initial heat of the exchange – so that I can arm her with some good stuff to say about me when we get resistance from the friends.

Then I go meet the friends. Merely cute chicks are rarely alone, hot chicks are never alone.

To get some privacy with her from the friends in the venue – you need to win over the friends.

“She’s (the prospect) terrible at introductions…”
“Archie, world renowned intern to the assistant to the head janitor at Goldman Sachs. I get to say I’m in finance”

Or whatever’s on my mind. Something over the top, shows creativity, maybe a bit of understanding of her world. Have to run attraction game on the group.

“Oh you must be Bertha, Agatha told me you were a sweetie pie.” (especially if the target Agatha said Bertha was a straight bitch – to which you always reframe to the target that her friends are just loving and protective)

“Bertha is exactly like you said she was…now if what you said was right, you think she’d be interested in that thing…”
*raise eyebrows*
“is sharing truly caring?”

Implying a 3some or something sexy and racy is typically enough for me to defuse the female protection.
The rawness and humor of it makes things easier.

That being said, sometimes the female friends are way more wound up than is warranted. They will do the tug of war with your prospect being the rope.

Handling the guy in the group

“Hey dude, what’s up man”

If he tries to cut your legs out from under you, always go for the jugular,

“Dude if I was you I would totally talk to Agatha. You don’t like her like that? She’s cool and gorgeous. You want me to say something to her”

Laying an orbiter’s desire for your target out will leave most of them flatfooted. (and if you’re the orbiter, in that situation, totally embrace the frame, go with it, and take it further)

But if he’s cool, be cool to him. Ideally you can run a quick little mini mission with him while you chill with Agatha’s group. “Dude, you’re the man, we need to get you laid tonight….” And then just open the next chick within earshot and introduce him.

All while this is happening – your target is watching you interact with her friends, with strangers, and she’s not seeing any red flags. You’re a cool social guy.

So you’ve won over the friends. You’ve attracted the chick and made her invest.

Move to a different part of the club/venue, and “get to know her a little more”. But this ain’t the time for “What did you want to be when you grew up” kind of discussion.

But that’s basically it.


  1. After she’s open
  2. Make her double down
  3. Find out her situation
  4. Find her friends
  5. Disarm the friends
  6. Get some privacy
  7. Suggest a place to connect