Internal and External Implications of Pre-Selection

The scenario

You’re new to a city, this is your first few weeks of hitting the night life. You’re going out solo.

But you have something going for you.
Maybe you’re tall
Maybe you’re built
Maybe you’re short (which draws attention that you can flip)
Maybe you’re a stylish dresser

So you leverage your attention by mingling with individuals that like your style.

In the closed and artificial environment of a night club, sometimes people who are less social, who are dying to be more social, not drunk yet – they watch you having a good time with others.

You are seen having a good time.
Other people are seen having a good time with you.

So the way the mind works – you make others have a good time. In less technical speak – you’re the life of the party – the person who has the right emotions and the right ability to transmit those emotions to others – so they loosen up and have a good time.

That’s one aspect of social proof as it applies to the night game.

In practice, I talk to one group of 3 people about a topic of the day. Mary J Blige’s ex husband is suing her for more spousal support because he can’t live on 30,000 a month. You already know how this conversation is going to go. The pro’s and con’s.

There will be another group of people next to me, i’ll try my best to do this
1) start a debate between me and group #1
2) bring in group #2 to decide.

And now that we’re all in a conversation – i’ll introduce group #1 to group #2.

So that’s the practical.

Group #2 thinks I’m social because they watched me interact with group #1 and themselves.

People across the way, people not involved – sometimes notice that a discussion is being had. They can’t hear the conversation, but they can see the reactions.

If I cross the dance floor and chat up the next set of people

How do I know if they saw me kill it with the first two groups?

If they didn’t see me – do I have a social proof?

If I walk in with a stunner on my arm, but she goes to the powder room – does the next chick to look in my direction notice my pre-selection?

If a tree falls in the forest….

So the mechanism of social proof, in the night game context, is whether people see you being social.

If they don’t see you being social, you have no social proof.

If we were to graph his over time – if you keep going to the same spots – you’ll see that a good # of people also go the same time you do – so your “social capital” will build with them. They see you chat up 5 groups of people over 6 weeks – but you haven’t talked to them – they’ll give you social proof benefit when you show up by yourself and not talking to anyone. We’ve talked about this pseudo-social circle that exists in a club that can be made real through interaction in and outside of the club.

If people don’t see you – is there any in the moment benefit?

Yes there is.

Interacting with people gets you social – so that energy carries over to the next interaction.

And building up that reservoir over time – makes it easy to get into that first conversation

These benefits of socializing are not social proof, but they are internal benefits that affect your in-person game.

Pre-Selection is even better.

So the typical pre-selection scenario is that you come to a venue with a cuties or some cuties. People recognize that you’re a guy with chicks. Other chicks see you with your women, and just rank you higher – especially if the chicks you’re with give you good reactions and favorable body language. If you show up with a model and it looks like she doesn’t want anything to do with you (it can look pathetic, but you can spin it ) – that’s not as good as having a cute chick eating up whatever you’re selling.

So that’s the external benefit.

But if you’re used to having women, beautiful women in your life, you take that with you when she’s not on your arm.

You see guys do a lot of Number creep. A chick that was a 8 when they started, becomes a 6 – because beauty is common. Then it becomes an ego stroke fest in some guys who have unhealthy attitudes about women and poor self esteem themselves. The only girl that is not enough for them, are ones that don’t want to do anything with them. For those guys, they need a supermodel – which is a social marker more than some objective thing – in order to feel like they’re worthy. But they get the chick, she doesn’t make him feel like he thought he would feel – and now both of them have a problem.

For guys with healthy mindsets, imo, a nice external appearance is a given – so that looks are not enough.

That immunity to make up allows them to interact with very beautiful women as human beings.

She’s no longer a thing to be possessed. She’s just a person with somewhat symmetrical facial features and pleasing amounts of body fat well distributed.

The proverbial strip club owner has seen it all and has demystified the feminine mystique. He now looks to her personality and behavior. She can’t pull the shit on him that she normally pulls on other guys – because she’s powerless.

So having pre-selection, experience with beautiful women – ends up staying with you – and in the club when you’re spitting your game – you can be as ferocious as you need to with your Jackie Guerrido.

-Archie

5 thoughts on “Internal and External Implications of Pre-Selection”

  1. Truly internalizing the benefits of social proof was definitely a game changer for me. I consider it one of the pillars of game.

    A recent non game scenario drove the point home further for me. A friend adopted an abused shelter dog. I went over to see him and when I walked through the door the new dog saw me and started barking aggressively and would not come anywhere near me when I tried to pet him. That is UNTIL my friends other dog came over and got excited while i pet him. Instantly the new dog comes over and let’s me pet him even though he barely knows this other dog either.

    The “social proof” from the other dog isn’t going to make the new dog instantly love me but it will allow me the opportunity to create “attraction” and build “rapport”.

    (Next time I went over the other dog was not there and the new dog would not come near me again)

    Dat Caesar Milan game

    It’s the same way with people. If women see you having fun with other people they assume you’re safe and fun. It allows you the opportunity to build trust and create attraction.

    One of the things that propelled my game was being able to open random people consistently and realizing social proof doesn’t just work to help get a set open, but it can also help activate a women’s competitive nature. Couple examples;

    A. Hooked a 4 set of girls (I really need to work on mixed sets, tips anyone?), suggested a venue bounce they agreed but had to go to the bathroom first. The girl I had hooked told me to go wait by the door for them and we’ll all go together (I didn’t like the idea of being told to do something, especially “go wait in the corner for us” ) I walked over to the door and opened the first set of girls I saw (disqualified myself) and as soon as my girl was walking over I pumped them up and gave them a huge hug. Instead of looking like a chode waiting in the corner I was the pimp making two girls laugh.

    B. Had a girl from a two set socially and semi sexually hooked, and as we waited by the bar for some excuse juice my girl said something sly about maybe I should sleep with the girl next to us who we briefly chatted with. I laughed reopened that girl and started getting her laughing with my back to the first girl. Like two minutes in the first girl starts holding my hand from behind (we hadn’t touched at all yet) I didnt look back while pretending nothing was happening. When finally turn around a minute or two later she was HOOKED after that.

    C. Briefly opened an ugmo early in the night. Something most “players” would not do. Couple hours later I opened a two set and they asked who I was here with. I told them I came alone yada yada I don’t have any friends lol yada yada. As I was saying this the ugmo (hb5) walks by and I smile and wave and she smiles and waves back. As soon as I do one of the girls (hb7 aka hb8.5 on rvf) goes OMG you’re a liar you do know people and runs her hand down my chest (instant ioi).

  2. Another dope post.

    And Tr1cky’s comment was Gold.

    In my limited night game experience, one of the only numbers I got from nightgame that lead to an actual date was in an instance where I got the digits, then had fun with another set (of like 4 blonde Euro chicks, who are just so much more pleasant to deal with), and the girl at one point in the night makes eye contact with me, seeing I’m having fun, and I say “will we hang out soon?” And she went “you look pretty pre-occupied.”

    Really need to internalize the value of “disengaging” briefly from a target, instead of approaching it like a bull.

  3. Nice article Archie. Some of my recent experiences have led me to believe that social proof is the most important part of night game.

    I was at a house party one time. I was with a friend playing a drinking game with a few others. I was having a great time just focusing on the fun. Later in the night I chat with a girl and get her number. The next time I was out with her, her version of the story was that she saw me “running” the drinking game. In reality, that wasn’t close. But the fact that I was having fun and making a lot of gestures made it seem like I was running the game. Girls are very perceptive about those cues.

    Some of my suggestions:
    -When your playing a drinking game, make it seem to an outsider that you are one controlling the game. Be loud, do some big space taking gestures, tell others what to do. It will make it seem like you are the leader.
    -When chatting with a group, plant your feet straight ahead and chat that way. Make everyone look at your direction. It will perceived as you being the leader of the group. Lean back so that the others lean in creating artificial interest.
    -When hanging out with a girl at a bar, go up to the bouncer and dap him up. Do it even if you don’t know him. The bouncers will never reject it. Act like you know how. When walking, give eye contact some dudes and if they give it back, just say “hey. whats up”, dap him up. Your girl will likely ask “do you know him”. Just lie and say yes. You have to make yourself seem popular at the bar even if you don’t know anyone there.

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