You’re new to a city, this is your first few weeks of hitting the night life. You’re going out solo.
But you have something going for you.
Maybe you’re tall
Maybe you’re built
Maybe you’re short (which draws attention that you can flip)
Maybe you’re a stylish dresser
So you leverage your attention by mingling with individuals that like your style.
In the closed and artificial environment of a night club, sometimes people who are less social, who are dying to be more social, not drunk yet – they watch you having a good time with others.
You are seen having a good time.
Other people are seen having a good time with you.
So the way the mind works – you make others have a good time. In less technical speak – you’re the life of the party – the person who has the right emotions and the right ability to transmit those emotions to others – so they loosen up and have a good time.
That’s one aspect of social proof as it applies to the night game.
In practice, I talk to one group of 3 people about a topic of the day. Mary J Blige’s ex husband is suing her for more spousal support because he can’t live on 30,000 a month. You already know how this conversation is going to go. The pro’s and con’s.
There will be another group of people next to me, i’ll try my best to do this
1) start a debate between me and group #1
2) bring in group #2 to decide.
And now that we’re all in a conversation – i’ll introduce group #1 to group #2.
So that’s the practical.
Group #2 thinks I’m social because they watched me interact with group #1 and themselves.
People across the way, people not involved – sometimes notice that a discussion is being had. They can’t hear the conversation, but they can see the reactions.
If I cross the dance floor and chat up the next set of people
How do I know if they saw me kill it with the first two groups?
If they didn’t see me – do I have a social proof?
If I walk in with a stunner on my arm, but she goes to the powder room – does the next chick to look in my direction notice my pre-selection?
If a tree falls in the forest….
So the mechanism of social proof, in the night game context, is whether people see you being social.
If they don’t see you being social, you have no social proof.
If we were to graph his over time – if you keep going to the same spots – you’ll see that a good # of people also go the same time you do – so your “social capital” will build with them. They see you chat up 5 groups of people over 6 weeks – but you haven’t talked to them – they’ll give you social proof benefit when you show up by yourself and not talking to anyone. We’ve talked about this pseudo-social circle that exists in a club that can be made real through interaction in and outside of the club.
If people don’t see you – is there any in the moment benefit?
Yes there is.
Interacting with people gets you social – so that energy carries over to the next interaction.
And building up that reservoir over time – makes it easy to get into that first conversation
These benefits of socializing are not social proof, but they are internal benefits that affect your in-person game.
Pre-Selection is even better.
So the typical pre-selection scenario is that you come to a venue with a cuties or some cuties. People recognize that you’re a guy with chicks. Other chicks see you with your women, and just rank you higher – especially if the chicks you’re with give you good reactions and favorable body language. If you show up with a model and it looks like she doesn’t want anything to do with you (it can look pathetic, but you can spin it ) – that’s not as good as having a cute chick eating up whatever you’re selling.
So that’s the external benefit.
But if you’re used to having women, beautiful women in your life, you take that with you when she’s not on your arm.
You see guys do a lot of Number creep. A chick that was a 8 when they started, becomes a 6 – because beauty is common. Then it becomes an ego stroke fest in some guys who have unhealthy attitudes about women and poor self esteem themselves. The only girl that is not enough for them, are ones that don’t want to do anything with them. For those guys, they need a supermodel – which is a social marker more than some objective thing – in order to feel like they’re worthy. But they get the chick, she doesn’t make him feel like he thought he would feel – and now both of them have a problem.
For guys with healthy mindsets, imo, a nice external appearance is a given – so that looks are not enough.
That immunity to make up allows them to interact with very beautiful women as human beings.
She’s no longer a thing to be possessed. She’s just a person with somewhat symmetrical facial features and pleasing amounts of body fat well distributed.
The proverbial strip club owner has seen it all and has demystified the feminine mystique. He now looks to her personality and behavior. She can’t pull the shit on him that she normally pulls on other guys – because she’s powerless.
So having pre-selection, experience with beautiful women – ends up staying with you – and in the club when you’re spitting your game – you can be as ferocious as you need to with your Jackie Guerrido.